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Blog: Criminally stupid people are my favorite

9:16 PM, Mar 28, 2013   |    comments
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Being criminal and stupid is my favorite combination as long as no one gets hurt, and even better if they get caught and punished for their behavior.

Not that being a criminal is something that highly intelligent people engage in unless they are wily white-collar criminals embezzling company funds.

But two of the most recent examples of what local Brimfield Police Chief David Oliver would call "mopes" made me laugh out loud.

The first set of stupid criminals are in Florida and know that, according to the police reports, they walked right back to the scene of the crime and into the arms of police officers.

Two people accused of breaking into a car and home in northeast Palm Bay were arrested when they tried to return to the crime scenes to pick up a cell phone they'd left behind.

Jeanette P. White, 19, and Tyrone G. Cole Jr., 31,  broke into a car and home on Brescia Street on Monday. Seems the brilliant couple is accused of taking items worth hundreds of dollars, including a GPS, jewelry, Apple laptop, TV, guitar and video games.

Quite a haul, huh?

Apparently they took the stolen TV to Cole's home when White realized she had left her backpack and cell phone at the house they had just robbed.

So, that's when they decided to go back to the house they had robbed and get the backpack and the phone. That was their second mistake -- the first was robbing the house in the first place.

When they approached the house, they were stopped by a Palm Bay police officer, who arrested each of them on charges of burglary and grand theft.

Ta-da. Criminal AND stupid.

But my favorite has to be the guy who committed a crime of "fashion" while trying to break into a convenience store.

Police in the far Northern California city of Redding are asking for the public's help in identifying the suspect in a botched burglary. But if the man is wearing the same bright pants and jacket seen in surveillance footage, they may not need it.

The video released Wednesday by Redding police shows the man walking up to a closed grocery store in the middle of the night and looking inside through its front window.

He walks away but quickly returns, his face covered with what appears to be a pair of black pantyhose. He throws something at the window, cracking it.

The man then flees, tripping twice, once on a parking curb. He is wearing a brightly patterned jacket and pants. Police say they responded to a burglary alarm at the grocery store at about 1 a.m. on March 5.

I could give you more examples but I want you to start the weekend with a big smile on your face so I'll sign off now so you can watch the video:


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