ST. LOUIS — If you heard what we just heard — the sound of pens dropping, echoed gasps of disbelief with mouths agape — don't be alarmed; they, too, are trying to process the newest sensation of a petition online.
The 'word' shouldn't be 'no,' it should be 'yesn't,' says petition creator Ewan Maloney.
Yesn't, that means almost everything you've thought you've known about basic grammar from both your childhood and adult life could simply cease to exist, replaced by a non-word — a factitious contraction — for the sake of the infamous 'just 'cause.'
"Change the word 'No' in the English language to 'Yesn't'," argues the petition on Change.org. Maloney, who resides in the United Kingdom, disregarded the prior use of Change.org petitions in the sense that there's little to no information to support his argument. That, though, doesn't matter because it quickly took off through social media.
As of Friday morning, Maloney has acquired over 29,000 signatures out of the requested 35,000 signatures, and that number rises by the minute.
Naturally, the response is often greater than the trendsetter, as displayed by the comments on Twitter and on Change.org.
"No = Yesn't," joked one Twitter user. "Yes = Non't = Yesn'tn't."
"I believe in a strong future for America," commented a Change.org user.
"Yesn't just makes more sense," said another Change.org commenter.
Remember, there's yesn't longer anything the internet will yesn't touch if it means a good joke can come out of it.